Phone etiquette, er, lack thereof

Cell phones have certainly been a blessing, but they have also become a great source of irritation.

Years ago, when we had our mom-and-pop store, we felt it necessary to install a sign stating, “NO CELL PHONES AT THE COUNTER!” This occurred after many failed communication attempts with customers who insisted that the incoming call was more important than speaking to the person at the register. Instead, we were limited to frantic gesticulations – grunting, finger-pointing to mysterious items behind the counter, more grunting, frantic head shaking, and sighs. And some had the audacity to get angry at us for our failed attempts to guess what they wanted, while they chattered to their friend about the appropriate beach attire for tomorrow’s soiree. Ugh! And guess what, soon other stores in the area were displaying the same warnings.

While I don’t think most people do this intentionally, they also haven’t taken a moment to see how their behavior affects others.

I clearly remember a local teenage customer asking me about the sign. Why, because it’s rude! “Huh?” So, I explained to her why we felt the sign was necessary. “Oh”, she replied. “I never looked at it that way before.” We forced her to think, and I saw the light bulb of recognition. One down, hundreds to go…

You’re having dinner with a friend when their phone rings. Instead of calling the person back, you must sit through their six-minute conversation. Excuse me, but that couldn’t have waited? I thought you wanted to have a conversation with moi!

Someone calls you, then puts you on hold for three minutes, while they take another call. Uh, hello, didn’t you call me? Next, I’ll be expecting to hear a recorded message stating, “Dear friend, your call is very important to me, however…” While that may be acceptable when I call my dentist’s office…

Or this one! A friend comes to visit you but spends most of their time texting other people while in your company. One friend immediately comes to mind, was guilty of this repeated offense. It became so grueling and frequent, that I finally had to ask her to put her phone down. However, she stared at me as though I asked her to hand over her bank account or firstborn. “It’s my kids”, she’d reply defensively (her children were 19 and 21).

I realize there may be times when there’s an emergency, or you’re expecting an important call from your doctor regarding your test results, but for Pete’s sake, focus on the moment. Why must the phone always take precedence? What it tells the other person (yes, that human being you were previously engaged with) is that they are secondary. Everything and everyone else comes first. You say that’s not true, but hell, your actions speak louder than words. Sorry, next time I’ll try harder to be more entertaining.

Last but not least, you don’t answer your phone/text immediately. This is a faux pas! Sin of all sins! Didn’t you realize that? Hmmm, in my defense:

1. I was taking a shower
2. I was feeding the birds
3. I was on the phone with someone else
4. I was entertaining
5. I was in line at the store (uh, having a conversation with the cashier)
6. I didn’t feel like talking
7. I was sleeping
8. I was meditating
9. I was watching a live show
10. I was eating dinner
11. I have a LIFE!

Update – May 20, 2024

I’m here this morning, touching on the subject once again. I’m tempted to tell people to leave their phones in their cars, in their purses, or turn them off until you’re no longer in my presence.

It’s a damned obsession, and I’m beginning to see why one friend won’t own a cell phone. Maybe he’s smarter than the rest of the world.